How important is what others think of us? How far do people go to be liked? Is fitting in important? Does being alone really mean being lonely?
I’m not a philosopher, but I have been witness to many a peculiar human act. As a species we truly seek the company of others. Sometimes we wear a proverbial mask that portrays us similar to those around us, even if on our own we would not act the same. Sit and observe a group of teenagers at a mall if you don’t believe me.
I have seen people get haircuts, etc to blend in. Get tattoos because others did. Buy a certain brand or type of clothing. Why do we do this? I don’t need to look like, act like, or dress like someone else to love myself. Yet at times I feel I have done just that.As if I needed their approval to be okay. I AM OKAY! Just the way I am.
Not everyone wants to grow a portion of their own food. I do. Not everyone wants to spend solitary moments in nature. I do. Not everyone wants to continually learn new things. I do do.
Do I want to fit into society? Of course I do. But at what cost? I don’t want to quit being me just to be accepted by someone else. As Popeye said, “I yam what I yam, and that’s all what I yam.”
I am not perfect. I have flaws. But I can look in the mirror and respect the man I see. I served my country. I give an honest day’s work. My life is not a facade. I am a simple man leading a simple life.
If GOD provides me another chance at romance I’ll give it a try.But until then I’d rather be alone and happy than be in a relationship where I sacrifice my happiness for that of someone else.
Enough rambling for one night. But it feels good to finally write again.
Its November. The weather here is stuck in Summer mode. Matching or breaking previously set record highs. Almost daily thunderstorms. Yard work really is a chore, either too hot or too wet. A/C runs continually, tea won’t stay cold, mop the floor just to drag in a fresh coat of mud. Did I mention its November?
On the bright side I don’t have to manually water the garden each night. Plants that normally would be difficult in November are thriving. Weeds are also thriving, but that’s okay. Into every-life some rain must fall. Flowers on the Okra plants hint of upcoming stews. Bright green Kale glistens in the morning dew. Trimmings from an overgrown Rosemary bush are hanging inside just for the aroma, I could never use it all for cooking or garnish.
Rainy nights make for great sleep. Tomorrow it will be back to work, but this week is split by Veteran’s Day, so there will be a brief respite. I actually enjoy my job most of the time and although there is always a wrinkle in our plans we seem to find a way to work through it.
Not sure what the future holds. Today, I plan to sit on the couch with my dog and enjoy the moment. The weather will change in due time. Did I mention its November?
Ellie May is the newest addition to my family. She was formerly known as Baby Girl at the pound where I got her. She dug up most of my garden her first week here. Rather than punish her I added more fencing. She was just doing what came natural. Now we are both learning how to interact with each other in ways that are mutually beneficial. Baby steps towards a lifelong friendship.
After making efforts to keep her out of the garden, I spent more time doing what she likes, mostly play-fighting and fetch. I also expanded my garden on the other side of the fence. I added two more raised beds, each with more tasty and nourishing plants. Baby steps on my way to sustainability.
Tomorrow I plan to visit my parents and work in Dad’s garden. His is much larger than mine, but last year he lost almost all of his plants to pests. Pickle-worm destroyed multiple types of squash, melons and cucumbers. The use of raised beds may reduce the damage from these pests. The pigs, coons and armadillos are a different story. Another Baby step towards self sufficiency.
I hope someday to reach a state of complete self reliance, until then I’ll keep taking Baby steps.