Much Needed Self Inspection

Raised Bed Garden Box

Raised Bed

Due to excessive rain, a busy schedule, and lack of inspiration my yard and garden became overgrown with weeds. I don’t control the weather, my schedule is always busy. So what is different than when I found time to garden? Right, my inspiration.

The weather was nice yesterday and I went to visit my parents. Mom was getting ready to go to the church pantry where she volunteers rather frequently. She doesn’t get paid, but she finds satisfaction in helping others. Dad was mowing their five acre property, because it gives him pride to have a nice looking yard. My parents, who are in their 70’s, were actively engaging life. I suddenly felt small. I have less than an acre, they have 5. Weeds were everywhere in my yard. Theirs was well manicured. I wasn’t participating in much other than work. I was in a rut. Even my dog seemed depressed. I needed a wake-up call.

After returning home I immediately took a self-inventory. Where had the passion gone? It wasn’t gone. It was covered by the all too familiar self pity. I could have berated myself. I could have come up with another excuse. I chose instead to take action. I mowed the lawn. I pulled some weeds. I treated myself to a wonderful dinner. I played with my dog. I felt good.

There is still much to do, but I can get it done. Instead of looking at the situation as impossible, I realized that eating an elephant isn’t hard if you take it one bite at a time. Self love, self reliance are what we need to survive. For months I had been existing rather than living. I’m back among the living. This wasn’t the first hurdle and it won’t be the last. My lawn and my garden are in much better shape today than yesterday. My self esteem is better than it has been in months. I value myself. I love life again.

A simple visit to my parents opened my eyes to where happiness lies. Happiness comes from within. It is what we do for ourselves and others that bring us true joy. It isn’t what we have, it’s what we choose to do with it.

I have more weeds to pull. I have more gardening to do. Tomorrow is looking brighter. Here’s to tomorrow!

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